中国教育在线 中国教育网 加入收藏 设为首页

2014年11月8日雅思写作解析及语料库

http://en.eol.cn  来源:  作者:新东方  2014-11-10    

 

  特别提醒:科学填报志愿比取得好成绩更加重要。考试结束了,尽快估分选大学、确定志愿吧。请点击这里,帮你解决!

  11月8日雅思写作小作文:

  柱形图:

  11月8日雅思写作大作文:

  Some think that most crime is the result of circumstances such as poverty and other social problems. Others believe that most crime is caused by people who are bad by nature. Discuss both sides and give your opinion 有人认为犯罪是贫困或者是他的社会问题的结果,有人 认为犯罪者人性本恶,讨论两种观点,给出你的观点。

  提问点评:新题出现,说完美押中的"名师"都是哗众取宠。

  2014年11月8日雅思写作小鹏哥押题:

  犯罪类:

  Sending criminals to prison is not the effective method to deal with them. Education and job training should be used instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree? 将犯罪分子送进监狱不是有效的方式解决犯罪,我们应该给他们提供接受教育和工作培训的机会,是否认同?

  11月8日雅思写作题目解析:

  1. 周围的环境引起犯罪:贫困;择业难;校园暴力;枪支泛滥等

  2. 本性就是坏人:人性本恶,有人天生就是注定犯罪的

  薛鹏解析:两种观点讨论;必须支持给出的一方观点。

  两种观点讨论布局图:

  首段:背景介绍(个性开篇)+争议焦点(淡化模板)+ 作家立场(清晰表达)

  二段:正方观点的展开(三点展开,细节例证支持)

  三段:反方观点展开(二点展开,他人口吻,细节例证支持)

  尾段:再次亮明观点 + (总结理由)

  作家观点:支持犯罪是由于贫困和社会环境引起的。

  思路拓展:

  贫困和社会问题导致犯罪 = 外因引起犯罪:

  1. 贫困的家庭孩子没有受到良好教育,不能明辨是非,容易被引入迷途。

  2. 科技发展,传媒多元,色情暴力节目的传播,毒害心灵,误导人生观,诱发犯罪冲动。

  3. 枪支泛滥,为犯罪提供了便利,例如,在一些西方国家,枪支买卖合法。

  人性本恶=内因引起犯罪:

  1. 有人认为,人性本恶,嫉妒,贪婪,自私,都是人的固有本质,一旦在后天被激发,没有正确的引导,会导致一些反社会行为的发展。

  2. 例如,女性经济犯罪;黑社会大哥的惯性犯罪,报复社会,诅咒和憎恨他们认为不公平的社会。

  薛鹏原创范文赏析:

  首段:背景介绍 + 争议焦点 + 作家立场

  Alarmingly, various stories concerning crimes have been pushing into spotlight. Conflicting ideas clash in finding out the root causes of misdeeds. My stand is that external reasons have a bigger influence on those misconducts. Nobody is born to be a criminal.

  薛鹏点评:淡化模板;观点鲜明。

  薛鹏解析:

  1. various stories 公众新闻报道

  2. concerning 关于

  3. have been pushing into spotlight …… 成为关注的焦点

  4. conflicting ideas clash in …… 矛盾的观点在……方面互相碰撞

  解析:clash v碰撞

  二段:正方三个观点的展开:

  My arguments could be easily explored. One contributing factor triggering manifold malefactions could be owed to the external circumstances in which the one is raised. To put in details, in some poverty-stricken or violent families, children are usually not properly taken care of and they stand few chances of receiving fine education, it is likely that such children may easily be led astray and even worse, they may conduct some anti-social offences. Still, pornographic or otherwise vulgar forms of media, have a really adverse impact on the young because the young can, in most cases, find it rather difficult to make positive choices about the types of influences in their lives, thus,it is possible for them to turn to a life of crime. Last, many perilous products that could be harnessed commit crimes are very easily and cheaply available to the youths. In fact, guns are sold in a number of stores in some countries. This fact alone makes it very easy for some people to embark on the criminal road.

  三段:反方二个观点的展开

  Granted, some people might remain suspicious of my stand and believe that those perpetrators are born to be evil. Some people argue that habitual malefaction is the main root cause of high crime rate. As for those felons such as gangsters boss or professional blackguards, to break the law is to take revenge on the society which they think unfair. Besides, some people contend that such is human nature to be greedy, selfish and jealous, which accounts for many types of crimes. It is also found that some women commit economic crimes simply because they are more vain and avaricious than others.

  薛鹏解析:

  1. habitual malefaction 惯性犯罪

  2. felons 重罪人

  3. gangsters boss or professional blackguards 黑帮大哥和职业流氓

  4. take revenge on the society which they think unfair 报复认为不公平的社会

  5. vain and avaricious 虚荣的贪婪的

  尾段:再次亮明观点 + 总结理由

  In a nutshell, I re-affirm my stand that different crimes could be combination of various elements, however, in comparison with evil nature, external factors actually play a profound influence in leading some immature or inexperienced people to go astray.

  薛鹏全文点评:本文依然保持小鹏哥原创范文的高质量,符合雅思写作评分各项标准,建议背诵精彩词汇句法。11月份月末两场考试请关注新东方网雅思频道,小鹏哥预测近期发布。

  类似提问角度:

  The position of women in society has changed markedly in the last twenty years. Many of the problems young people experience, such as juvenile delinquency, arise from the fact that many married women now work and are not at home to care for their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the opinion? 有人认为:父母工作,无暇照顾孩子,导致少年发展,是否同意?

  薛鹏原创语料库:

  1. juvenile crime = adolescent crime青少年犯罪

  2. teenage crime = juvenile delinquency青少年犯罪

  3. young offenders = teenage criminals = young law-breakers 少年犯

  4. embark on the criminal road 走上犯罪道路

  5. turn to a life of crime 开始罪恶的人生

  6. conduct some anti-social offenses 做出反社会行为

  7. commit crime = violate the law 犯罪

  8. domestic violence = family violence家庭暴力

  9. pornographic or bloody contents色情的血腥的内容

  解析:porno (色情)+ graph(记录)+ic (…… 的) = pornographic 色情的

  10. blindly model after sth 盲目效仿

  11. to be led astray被引入歧途

  12. Some criminalities can be owed to the disadvantaged family background such as poverty, violence or parental divorce. 不良的家庭成长环境,例如贫困,暴力和父母离异。

  13. According to the statistics, the rate of youth crime is in proportion to that of divorce rate. 少年犯罪率和离婚率成正比。

  解析:is in proportion to 成正比

  14. An environment of poverty, violence and fear. Such a growing environment often results in low self-esteem and other growth-related concerns. 较低的自尊心和一些成长相关的问题。

  解析:self-esteem 自尊

  15. It is also found that some women commit economic crimes simply because they are more vain and avaricious than others. 人们发现,有些女性进行经济犯罪,仅仅是因为她们比其他人更加的虚荣和贪婪而已。

如有相关问题,可拨打免费咨询热线:010-58443520

考试培训小助手

本科留学qq:436560382

研究生留学qq:437946603

免责声明:

① 凡本站注明“稿件来源:中国教育在线”的所有文字、图片和音视频稿件,版权均属本网所有,任何媒体、网站或个人未经本网协议授权不得转载、链接、转贴或以其他方式复制发表。已经本站协议授权的媒体、网站,在下载使用时必须注明“稿件来源:中国教育在线”,违者本站将依法追究责任。

② 本站注明稿件来源为其他媒体的文/图等稿件均为转载稿,本站转载出于非商业性的教育和科研之目的,并不意味着赞同其观点或证实其内容的真实性。如转载稿涉及版权等问题,请作者在两周内速来电或来函联系。

外语电子周刊

推荐阅读
eol.cn简介 | 联系方式 | 网站声明 | 招聘信息 | 京ICP证140769号 | 京ICP备12045350号 | 京网文[2014]2106-306号 | 京公网安备 11010802020236号
版权所有 赛尔互联(北京)教育科技有限公司 CERNET Corporation
Mail to: webmaster@cernet.com